Village exploration

Upon our arrival into Cangyuan, we found to our dismay that the mudfest wouldn’t be until Monday afternoon – AND we had no hotel to sleep in.

Our intrepid group found hotel lodgings the first night and for the second night, we got more creative. All the hotels were expensive and we’re simple school teachers.

Massage parlor sleeping it was. I don’t need to go into more details but it is exactly that. A few of us got massages during the day and we asked them later if we could sleep on the massage beds – five comfortable mats to sleep ten people. Why not?

Look how comfy John is.

Cangyuan Menagerie!

Cangyuan, in its carnival type atmosphere was filled with random animals.

Here are some that I saw:

A lot of turtles! Small ones! Big ones! Medium – all cute!

Camel.

Peacocks that Laura thinks will peck out her eyes

A yak?

There’s something I need to get off my chest: we brought our own monkey because we feared that this carnival wouldn’t have enough animals… and

I hate dead scary things (scorpions, snakes, tarantulas)

But what about the Monihei Mudfest you ask? It’s coming!!

Making working out look fun

Our towns are so small that they AREN’T littered with random metal playground workout equipment that you will find in bigger cities – you know the ones – no resistance, primary colors, probably commandeered by old people/people who have no muscle mass.

When we saw some exercise equipment on the streets of Cangyuan, you’d better believed that we jumped on that stuff and made it the best thing – ever.

On the left, a two foot, personal see-saw that was lacking one foot, which began a body hoist machine. The right, a circular ab twirl-a-whirl that really works out your center of gravity. Yeah. Super useful.

Cangyuan, border town, carnie town

In China, a festival also means a lot of carnie games.

Chinese carnival games are low maintenance and only lame after you play them. This one that Axel is playing is throwing bean bags at beverages, if you knock one over, it’s yours.

Simple?

This is John Kuo’s one and only winning. The rest of the trip, he was drawn back to this game again and again only to lose all of his money.

New discovery: Lucas has a killer side arm capable of winning only the best of the cheap rice wines.

My favorite carnie game: button triggered crossbow shooting by the Wa people.

Mmm look at this concentration:

1 kuai per shot later, we all realized, this also wasn’t as enjoyable as it could have been. I did hit the blue though.

I’m not telling you to not play these games, I’m just saying that you should experience them- definitely and get back to me about HOW AWESOME IT WAS.

A Cave Surprise

Four hours had passed and we were less than an hour away when we were presented with a fork in the road. Our bus driver offered to take us down into the valley that we were passing; it was a mere two kilometers away. All of us agreed only to find that what was waiting for us wasn’t a river bank to frolic in but instead a tropical paradise framing a wondrous cave.

You know how caves in America are sealed off except for a directed path? How we’re told by teachers and tour guides alike that we can’t touch the stone formations so that they may maintain their natural form? Stay on the path. Don’t touch anything. Not in China babeeeee! None of these rules exist in rural China. Sure – there may be a sign or two somewhere but… no enforcers! Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Wild West of China, where cave exploring is an untamed art and we, young Americans can freely taste the fruits of nature.  Mmmmmm rocks.

The Mud Journey

As it turns out, plenty. Our trip hit a small hitch right at the beginning. Laura found our bus driver at 9 am with a bus half full of passengers already in his minibus. Originally we had negotiated for 11 people, so for less people, we should have been able to bring the price down because 11 was breaking the law, while 10 remained safely within the confines of safe driving, as safe as it can be in China. This simply wasn’t the case. Our driver wanted the same price for 10 of us and the reason for the minibus already half full was because he wasn’t sure we would actually show, so he had begun to load the bus anyway. Negotiations concluded – we packed into the bus and began the Peep slaughter.

The what, you ask?

In celebration of Easter the previous week, I received multiple packages of love from my friends in America.

Thanks, Jen Conner for these. Thanks, Audrey for the other goodies!!

Everyone loved starting their morning with a malnutritious snack for crack babies and nuclear war survivors. What are Peeps but the quintessential American holiday treat? Puffy marshmallow, made from mainly chemicals and sugar, covered in yellow – you guessed it, chemicals and sugar. YUM! Our bus driver, as you might be able to tell as I tried to feed it to him, LOVED IT.

Noms!

I knew from this slaughterous beginning that our trip would be amazing. Other highlights from the journey down -

• Sean, sitting in the decrepit seat that leaned back and made you feel like at any moment the seat was going the become unhinged and that you would fall out of a moving bus. Because his seat was tiled back halfway – it made it optimal for him to practice his ab workouts.

Sean, who by the time he arrived in Cangyuan was destined to have the most awesome abs ever.

• Lucas, who spent most of the ride wearing these di-vine sunglasses

He also tried on my hair.

• Ken, who acted many times like the deus ex machina – but only for food. Any time I pulled out a snack or treat, Ken’s mouth would magically appear in between the seats that Lucas and I were sitting in -  ready to consume whatever goodies I held in my hands.

 

Moni-what?

The literal meaning to Monihei has been translated as Touch you black, my original understanding of what Monihei without the tone markers was that it might have been Rub black mud with the mud and the black switched. Initially, I head of Monihei through Sophie, my Chinese postmate when we were debating places to go for May break. The only problem was that we were never concisely told when exactly May break was. I remembered dimly that when I studied abroad in Beijing in 2007 that May break was long enough so that a group of us could go to Xian and back. Those terracotta soldiers always seemed more exciting when they’re in the midst of an illegal smuggling action Tomb-Raider style heist, rather than sitting in a warehouse in the middle of a shopping complex.

Xian 2007.

After Sophie introduced the idea of Monihei – but I didn’t even consider it truly because I was under the impression that we would have somewhere along the lines of a week’s break and expanded my travel scope accordingly. Guilin? Beijing? Xian? Chengdu? All of that lay dormantly on the table as I realized I still have no idea when my actual holiday was.

We waited slowly, until the Sunday of last week when noticed arrived to our neighboring school, Maolan. Lucas informed me that it would be three days’ break – and in China that actually means the weekend plus one day.

Boo. Extended plans – out the window. Cangyuan and Monihei demanded a closer look. My understanding of Monihei was that it was a mud flinging festival similar to another holiday that we had just celebrated – Poshuijie  - the water flinging festival where you were allowed to douse anyone anywhere with buckets of water – definitely not safe, especially how the Chinese people do it. Still high on my indiscriminate water fight with various villagers and children, I had a feeling that only good things could come from indiscriminate mud fighting.

My imagination expanded as I began to do research. Monihei had been previously attended by an American and her boyfriend from Kunming. A travel company had wanted to raise exposure of the mud festival and wanted to invite some high profile white people to attend. They went, they had a great time, and their experience gave me some prospective on what to expect – how the mud was stored, how the festival would take place – on a field… I rounded up the fellows and with Laura’s help, we took a minibus that held 10 down to Cangyuan, a city super close to the Chinese – Burmese border. Nine am departure on Saturday with a Monday night return – what could go wrong?

The ten of us!

Thanks, Tom Haverfoods

Go to http://tomhaverfoods.com/ and go nuts. NOW. :)

Salon Habit

I'm writing on my blog that from today forward, I endeavor to get my hair washed at the salon, once a week, every week.

What does this mean in China?

It means, I go into a salon with my head super greasy and disgusting. Let's not lie, I haven't washed my hair in over 3 days.

Then, I sit down in a chair. A woman brings me water. I take a sip and two towels are placed on my shoulders. A little squeegee bottle is squeezing water on my head, and shampoo is being massaged into my scalp. They start the back of the head, and start accumulating more and more hair with a circular motion. 15 mins pass. Pressure points are being pressed. My eye close in bliss. 5 more mins pass.

She asks me to lie down on the bed attached to the sink, more pressure points massage. 10 more mins. Conditioner is applied, rinsed out and I'm taken a massage bed.

Head, face and pressure points massage. Right arm massage. Right hand massage. Left arm, left hand. Shoulders. Then, I turn on my tum and my back is rubbed down. An hour passes. I chat idly with the seventeen year old who compliments me on my skin, my Chinese, my white friends.

I sit back in the chair that I started in, I ask for my hair to be blown straight - 10 mins. Ringlets - add 20 more mins.

My hair looks amazing, my shoulders are loose and overall, I feel more relaxed than a nap would have been in the same time.

Time spent at the salon : 100 ~ 120 mins.

Money paid: 10 rmb  = $1.53 USD (according to Google today)

A Glee Treat

My kids haven't been absolute monsters lately and you know what that means? REWARD! Actually, I've been working on an art project which is coming into fruition and I needed an hour of time where I could set up individual meetings with each of my kids, so I decided to play the Valentine's Day episode of Glee for my kids. PYT, Katy Perry's Firework... what could go wrong?

Here are my kids comment the second the show ends: 太多kiss了!! If you don't know what that means.... they thought there was too much kissing! I liked that they used the English word, kiss, which I didn't even teach them! :)

They thought that the American high schools looked really open and happy - they asked me if I had a boyfriend in high school - and finally one of my favorite girls, Eve:

said that Katy Perry's Firework sounded like a calf crying. Hilarious. Too much kiss and Katy Perry sounds like a calf crying. Everyone in my class also agrees that Mike Chang is a delicious dancing treat. Takeaway: Chinese kids love Glee.

Cat Attack!

Another perpetual motion Hello Kitty, this time, three of them. Too much? Too old? Perhaps. China has done this to me. I'm not ashamed. They are solar powered little movers and I love them. They sit next to my bed now, next to my two Anthropologie candles, my Meltykiss strawberry chocolates, and my Wasabi and Soy sauce almonds. Sweet.

Excessively gorgeous spring flowers in Shaojie

These mysteriously luscious thangs are hanging out in our garden in Shaojie. Gorgeous, aren't they? I passed them this morning on the way to class and made a note to take more pictures this spring. Ten points to who can tell me what these things are.  I should just ask but who doesn't like the challenge?

NO MONEY NO HONEY

How honey is strained in rural China. Nothing beats Georgia honey, but this is kind of cool! I asked where the honey comes from - and the landowner's daughter simply said the mountain. Oh, hm. The mountain. Behold. Mountain honey!

To be young again

When Lucas was playing basketball with the teachers at the Blue Cat middle school, I kept busy by loving on the exploratory nature of small boys. Even if I was young again, I doubt that I would be doing this... but it's amazing how free spirited and ignorant of the hard hard pavement that they face if their little hands were to slip. Oh, pessimistic me.


Boys will be boys and little boys - even more so. Enjoy their cuteness!

Maolan steam cakes

In celebration of Easter which isn't until April 24 this year apparently, not like I would know by the candy sales at Target here. I mean, there isn't Target here, I don't actually mean that sarcastically... anyway - in pre-celebration of Easter, and actually mostly just in celebration of the weekend, I decided that I would head over to Maolan and conduct a small baking experiment! When I returned to the States in February, I made sure that I brought back the Wilton silicon baking cups that I bought from Sur La Table last year. Baking is a passion of mine and I wanted to make sure that I made it possible in China. With the cute cups, I also bought matching Easter egg with chicks cupcake papers. See:

Ah! But I'm getting ahead of myself, letting you see the finished product before I even show you my equipment. Surely you're wondering how I plan on baking muffins in China with no oven... I contemplated it for a while before my eyes fell upon this.

Ta da! The rice cooker, prominent in almost every Chinese household, Lucas, Casey and Chenyuan's house was no different. Sitting in the corner of the kitchen would be my oven for the day. I came prepared, not only with cups, papers, but a mix. A just add milk mix that I would never have touched in America.. but feel so blessed that I have in China!

After a quick pour of milk, I whipped the mix gently before I  dolloped tiny portions into the cups. 

 

 Would this turn out to be delicious or a hot mess? With fingers crossed, I tossed three experimental ones into the rice cooker.

 

Sssss! The steaming of the rice cooker sizzled as I lifted up the top. I couldn't resist! I had to seeeeee! Success.  Behold! Nommy blueberry American muffins. Just in time for Easter colors. 

The Biggie

I steamed with 1/3 of a cup of water at the bottom of the pan - I wasn't sure how the heat would travel through the rice cooker without the help of a little bit of moisture. Ten minutes later - another batch came out! I made a total of four batches of tiny mini steam cakes. Nothing tastes better than success on the first try. Except, perhaps repeated success... I have chocolate chip muffins - to which I will add some bananas, next time. For those of you coming to China with hopes of eating delicious baked goodies, there's hope for you yet!

The minis

*These muffins have received the Alex Casey Jones stamp of approval!

China's trashcan

When in doubt, throw it out the window.

Bus Station STRIKE!

Unlike it's big brothers and sisters, Beijing and Shanghai, Yunxian, a low low level city apparently has no problem allowing its bus drivers to go on strike. Strike? I don't know the process here but, there weren't any police batons out or people crowding around in dissent.

People can strike in rural China. It's true. Bus drivers sat in plastic chairs in the bus station depot, smoking, eating and pointing pointedly to the signs they had made to post on the buses. Regular civilians like yours truly milled around the bus station, taking, strangely, the only two routes still in operation. I think it's because my town is so rural that if there were no buses, people would go crazy. Thanks, Terror (my favorite bus driver, photo to come soon) for still operating bus lines!

Interesting signs right? Unfortunately, I can't... quite make it all out.

Sorry. Illiterate. BUT, I did take photos so that you can see what I see, and perhaps even translate? I figure, you know it must be shady if even the Chinese people are protesting.

THESE are not my kids

I wish my kids had it together like these kids in Japan. If they can do this:



Imagine what their performance is like in the classroom!

Hpnotiq: turning heads and breaking necks?

I don't know if you're old enough to remember Hyp and Hen - a classic gangsta drink mentioned in the early 2000s. That was my first introduction to Hpnotiq. My second came in the form of my mother. She had just been off traveling somewhere, stopped into Duty Free and was hypnotized into buying this beautiful blue bottle. Imagine her chagrin when I revealed to her the social context by which Hpnotiq in its beautiful opaque smokey bottle was being consumed. She removed the bottle of Hypnotiq from atop my upright piano and stored it away for ever. I haven't thought of Hpnotiq since, until this weekend.

Thanks, Greg for being so socially aware as to bring Hpnotiq BACK into my consciousness. Ya'll. It's a girl's drink now. No more mixing it with Hennessy. It's LADIES' NIGHT.

I find this hilarious. Somewhere, an advertising team is hoping that we don't remember Hpnotiq from 2004.

stood up

How does one explain to a room full of seventh graders the concept of being stood up? quite easily actually

How does one actually get stood up by a room full of seventh graders? ahh!!! today my kids in class invited me to go and honor the dead with them, they promised to get me, but instead - I waited, waited, all afternoon for them to come get me. What has life come to that 51 kids can't remember to come get their teacher for a dead honoring ceremony?

Quake continued

Take a glance at my part of the world. A is Shaojie, B is Dali - Dali is on both maps.

Earthquake in Shaojie!!

Things going through my head at the time:

Is my wooden cabin shaking?
Uh oh, I should put on some pants.
How about I put on this hoodie instead?

I think things are fine now. House not moving from side to side - side side to side (USHER)

We're safe again.

Now, a much more awesome picture of my seventh graders

Sometimes we have fun.

It's a Ludovico morning.

Today is one of those mornings where you wake up and it's seriously cold. Frigid. I turned on my heating blanket and I've got some serious rainy day piano music playing. This morning I woke up and I had a serious craving for Bach for Breakfast, a CD series that I discovered as a nerd in middle school. Everything about my life is like middle school all over again. Awkward, but enlightening.

I'm eating a cookies 'n' cream Luna bar as I'm typing this and it tastes as though it's laden with liqueurs. Mmmm! This sounds like it could be a problem that I think it's so delicious but.. hey. The stormy weather has made me glad that I kept all my winter clothes around and now can putz around my classroom warmly.

Gloomy rainy days mean that I will not be able to shower and that maybe just maybe I'll be inspired to paint. Happy Ides of March to ya'll in America. It's the day before St. Patty's Day here! In honor of St. Patty's... I reveal to you, my black board that is actually green and 53 of my 7th grade students.

I'm China

We entered the second semester of seventh grade with a unit on countries and their adjective form. After two full weeks in class, my students still say... "I'm Chinaaaaa.........ese?" This frustrates me, but I don't mind. I've been completely obsessed with grading things, if only to fill in the little boxes in my grade book. I was a suck up in seventh grade. Now that I'm teaching seventh - it's hard to stay as committed. I used to go to school early in the mornings, back when we still had to go to school for 7 hours a day. I'd go 90 mins early just so I could enter grades into a computer. That sick curiosity drove me just as my need to fill in the little boxes is driving me now.

The simple fact that I'm keeping track of all the work that I assign in my classes is helping me like I'm in control. I just got a crazy schedule change, which means that on Thursdays and Fridays, my kids are going to get English overload. Some of students have requested new names. Last semester, I didn't have the heart to give them less than decent names - now, I'm just going to look up the cast of the Expendables and go down the list.

Dolph
Sylvester
Mickey
Jet
Gary
Bruce
Arnold
Jason
Randy
Terry
Steve

I can't wait for Friday!

P.S. Since I'm in China, I thought I would post some Chinese food. I ate this today, and on Friday. The one I've posted was actually made by Chenyuan. Thanks, Lil' Buddy!