Can't touch this

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNDEzNTY3OTQw.html

If you like Call Me Maybe and you like Europe and shirtless men... click on the link above. If you don't... what is wrong with you? Happy Monday!

Sneak attack!

I took photos of my sneaky sixth graders and their art today. We started off pretty poorly with one of the boys cutting in front of one of the girls. When the girl told me, he kicked her. I ordered him to sit down and he tore his drawing in half. I was disappointed and almost stopped taking photos all together - I'm glad that I didn't. I think that only here, can this happen. It's not the first time it's happened in rural China, but it is the first time for me. 

Take a look at this picture.

At first glance, you might see the smirk on his face. You might look at his drawing and wonder... whaaaaaaaa? But then take a closer look. 

Is that?

Noooo. 

Yes. If you haven't seen it, look at his left shoulder - his left, our right. 

Is that a braid?

It's a bird. 

Like all the other students in class, he stood in front of the blackboard, put his drawing in front of him, but unlike the other students - he pulled what looked like a stuffed animal out of his pocket and put it on his neck.  He positioned it and smiled, then walked back to his desk - no problem.

It's a baby black birdee on his shoulder! After class, I told him to come to the front of the room and show me the contents of his pocket.

He put this on my table. Hi, cutie - stay a while! I asked my student where he got this little creature - he shrugged, nonchalantly saying that he found it on the way to school - I think it's sweet that he's been taking care of this chickadee for the past four days!

8 First Grade Portraits

Try as they might, first graders have the toughest time hiding their true selves, even for a second. Today in class, I vowed to capture each student in a uniform way, but after loading my photos onto my computer, I saw that there was no way that my students were going to fit into any mold.

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A Welcome to My Home!

For two years, I've been living at 中国云南省临沧市云县茂兰镇哨街村哨街学校 - a house with no number, in a village that is so small that it has no post office. 


I will miss this small plot of land on the side of the mountain that has been my primary residence for TWO years. I cannot stress this enough. It astounds me to think that I've lived here for so long. 


On a recent trip to Beijing, a friend introduced me as having lived in China for years - while I nodded in assent, it was strange to hear it for myself. This wooden house that leaks in rain has built a stronger me. All it took was two years. Also attributing to this new found strength - a rat, non-stop bugs, a broken foot, dirt and dust and ash and dirt, no electricity, no water, no refrigeration, no showers, no cold things,  everything opening directly outside, more rats, some cats, entrails at my door, way too many water bottles in my room, sneaky students, loving students, hard-working students, barking dogs, a mysterious donkey/door sound, moths the size of birds, mold, a true understanding of what it means to own ratty clothing. 


This past weekend, Caitlin and Kristen came over in order to sort through the piles of clothes, food, and stationery that Phoebe and I have accumulated over the two years. Most of the food and stationery were mine; Phoebe was giving away most of her clothes!


As a note to self, I took a picture of the clothes that I was giving away in order to remember, so as to not look for them in a few months - going crazy, tearing through my wardrobe looking for these pieces. 

A farewell to threads

Caitlin and Kristen pored over our things and fairly distributed our things between each other, as well as for Nora. To commemorate their visit, Kristen and Caitlin both took photos - and here is a photo of Kristen's that she has shared with me!

I live the mix of modern objects and the aged design of our humble home. For two years, we took this place over. Thanks for visiting, ladies! Thank you also for opening my eyes again to how  unique and unusual this experience has been, how extraordinary these two years in Shaojie and Teach For China have been. I look forward to seeing who will live here in the following years. 

I nailed it!

This continuous fascination is not healthy but you have to admit they look awesome. Here are the other two posts I've made in recent times about my nails ( here and here). While I know this is a habit that I simply can't maintain in America, I'm pledging to continue to take full advantage of the fact that getting my nails done here as a manicure costs 15 rmb ~ 2.357 USD.

Looking at these nails has reminded me how much I enjoy wearing black and I will fill my wardrobe with new and delightful black clothes once I return to America - in a month.

I want this top

Dear The Limited,

When I get back to America, will you still have this shirt for sale? Even better, can you put it ON sale?

NYMag says, "It's Okonomiyaki Time!"

As can be documented by my random posts (here and here) from 2009 and 2010, I'm obsessed with okonomiyaki. I haven't thought about eating it for almost a year now, but now that my return to American is imminent, check out this article from NYMag and for all my New York friends, I can't wait to see you this summer - let's sit down and eat some okonomiyaki!

A Feast of Dorkiness

A feast not in the food sense obviously, but... feast your eyes on this.

*I have whiskers on my face because I was dressed as Hello Kitty for our Trivia/Animal night.

Hooked!

If you've been reading my blog, my fascination with nail art, has grown. It started with this. I got my nails done in FQ for 15 kuai and afterwards, I couldn't stop looking at nail art tumblrs. Specifically - http://fuckyeahnailart.tumblr.com/.

Are cute animals on my nails acceptable at my age? Perhaps not. For 20 kuai, I found a place in Yunxian that would do it for me - the girl seemed confident that she could do it and.... in the end, she did - but it was difficult for her and she had to paint each nail, probably 2 to 3 times each.

I won't be going back there but damn these nails are cute!

As you can see, from this casual side shot of my eating of fried chicken and waffles - these penguin nails just look like a reverse French.

You might be wondering where did I get chicken and waffles in rural China?  I didn't. I went to Beijing last weekend!

Birthday Cake Oreos Ode

I read somewhere that these special edition birthday cake Oreos were made in honor of the anniversary of the  100 years of Kraft being in business. These boxes have 12 cookies in them and they cost more than $1 USD each. THEY ARE DIVINE. 

These Oreos are by far the best Oreos I've ever. had. EVER. They taste like funfetti cake - with a chocolate crust.

From the outside they look like original Oreos:



But Inside..... TA DA!



Sprinklesfantasmagora! This might not be a real word but it's the perfect description word for how the Oreos taste! I've wanted to post about these for so long, but I kept devouring them before I could take pictures of them!

Yerin Park, I love you.

Just look at her. so much sweet smiley clean baby love!!

Monica is going to kill me for posting this photo

...but last weekend was our final weekend in Dali and I think that this photo best illustrates what our weekend was. 

Full of pizza, beer, smirks of pleasure, and faces made when in the company of loved ones.

Dali, farewell perhaps forever!

BTW, this weekend was the first time that I've ever been called the girl with the dark eyebrows. Do you think that could be a euphemism? You can also see my newly short hair in this photo. Duh. It's still long. 

Little Monsters

The above is a collage of tiny tiny pictures of my fourth grade students' little monsters (Please click to enlarge!). In my elementary art classes, we've been practicing the application of previous knowledge in the form of drawing monsters; by first, drawing five animals, identifying the obvious parts of those five animals and then combining them in order to create monsters.

In Chinese, using the different parts of 动物 to create 怪物。If you don't speak Chinese, the wordplay may be lost on you. The clever one word change pleases all the elementary school students. My delivery is usually met with gasps and giggles.

The head of a giraffe, the body of a butterfly, the legs of a mouse

This is one of my favorite pictures. I had each of the students name their monster along with a listed description of the different animals components by which their little monster was made.


I urged each student to take liberties in coloring their monsters.

This is another one of my favorites due to it's sheer SCARINESS. A simple cross between a butterfly and a rabbit. It is nightmare inducing and slightly cute except for its sharp side teeth. AHH. Enlarge at your own risk!

I introduced this project to my students last week. The assignment was to draw 5 animals, 1 monster and each additional monster would equal one point on either the girls' or the boys' side. The winner of the rivalry gets to participate in the blind man's grab bag, which I will further explain at a later date. For homework, I told the students to draw more little monsters, as well as circle their favorite creation.

What you see in this post are what the students have selected. I expected my students to do my homework. What I didn't expect was them to take it by the teeth and fly it across the world to America. I say that because after entering class today, I was bombarded by 45 fourth graders each with notebooks full of little monsters. I drew stars for the boys' work and hearts to mark each little monster of the girls. One boy drew 78 little monsters for homework.  I spent all period forcing my students to come up one row at a time to stand in an orderly fashion as I marked and tallied each little monster. The grand total for each side came in favor of the girls. The girl had a strong showing of 661 monsters while the boys tried valiantly but failed at 639 monsters. AH! I found a project that the students loved :)!

Student stationery!

Move over Kate Spade, I've found a better, local creator for personalized stationery. MY KIDS. Don't be dismayed and condemn me of using child labor. The Congratulations cards were made for them to think about what students can celebrate with each other. The pandas holding balloons, my idea. In my eyes, each card that I'm showcasing is great for different reasons, shall I count the ways?

Creative lettering, awesome flowers, slightly human looking pandas, with just okay bamboo. B+.

Clear letters in different colors with a large panda in focus with tree like bamboos. You can see the erasure of the first CONGRATS, which was just fine. B+.

Electric CONGRATS, with two pandas, one self described as a tiger panda by the artist, and the other, looks kind of like a rat. The balloons resemble lollipops and the panda eyes look like they are tripped OUT. Great bamboo detailing. B+. Do you see a pattern?

Great symmetry! Four pandas, in a world where I believe that the more the merrier, the flowers are well placed and the balloons are different colors. A.

Nice attempt at the big word. I like the shade of blue the artist colored the bamboo. B+.

I have laughed all day about this one. The combination of the wide eyed panda, the goofy smile, the parallel bamboo, the in-motion bullet and the sniper that is in perfect position to shoot the panda in between the eyes. Hilarity. Strange. Above and beyond what I expect CONGRATULATIONS to mean. But, it's true. If my friend had shot a panda, I'd send them this perfect card, before they were carted to Chinese jail. A+.

REPEAT: Water Flinging Festival

Last year's Water Festival was awesome, so we had to do it again. But this year, we invited everyone, wore waterproof clothes, and bought our own buckets. At the end of the night, we ate Justin's smoked meats. 

 Instead of being picked up in a white van empty handed and being trucked up to a random village, this year we walked with buckets in hand, eyes wide open and fully expecting to get SLAMMED with water. Instead, we got water guns to the eyes and a crazy fort full of water manned by young, preteen boys.

STILL fun. We capped off our water fight with a shower, costume change and lunch. While we sat, Caitlin helped French braid my hair and we enjoyed , posing for photos and realizing that many of us were sunburned.

Awesome tan lines? Thanks. Later in the night, Monica and I pose after eating tons and tons of BBQ. Our smiles are genuine and so happy! We also played a lot of beer pong. These are our resident champions:

Don't be fooled by their feminine sorority squat poses. Tom and Gareth coordinate with one another in their dress and dominated our Beirut tourney. 

Lucas and I were both rueful in not being able to best G and T, but we somehow managed to NOT pose for this picture.  Several flip cup and Bananagram games later, this boy, Peter Brown Matthews, 

walked me back to my hotel where I took a blistering hot shower. Great day.

Call your girlfriend

and tell her we should do as Taran Killam on SNL did and learn how to dance to this Robyn song.

This side by side vid is incredible.




These people are living the dream.

Swamp Stomp womp womp

Tengchong has become a popular destination for Teach For China fellows because of its swamps. Technically it may be a marsh, but it's not as fun to say it's a marsh mash. Despite of what we as Americans have learned about preserving the environment, it's strange and delightful fun to be able to slide your feet into some rain boots and run around on top of a marsh.

Yes, my legs are that slimy. 

Last Monday, John, Mon, Sam and I awoke and stumbled into a car at seven in the morning. Our driver had swanky printed LV seats and dropped us off at a restaurant on the edge of the marsh. When the guards of the marsh arrive for work at 8 am, it becomes impossible for us to enter on the side entrance, thus if we arrive an hour earlier, it gives us plenty of time for the local guides to lead us deep into the marsh where the guards cannot impede out stomp fun. The good parts of the swamps were where the vegetation made the surface squishy and springy. A natural trampoline that would have otherwise been protected if it was in America. On the scary parts, I stepped, then in a moment of strange stillness, my leg fell straight through the vegetation and is immediately sucked into mud that is slimy and resists me as I try to pull it out. There were a lot of scary parts and as I'm comically clumsy, the guide had too much fun at my expense.

This is what Jon, Mon and Sam saw a lot. Me, climbing out of zee swampz.

John Kuo took a waay too much pleasure in my sinking. In this moment, all three of us are stuck in the mud. Monica would come closer, but she can't. Tricky tall dead grass.

Filthy fun. What I love at Teach For China. Sure, I was very inappropriately dressed. I was planning on going to Shangri-la where it was freezing. I didn't bring shorts. Also, I find that a silk blouse is pretty multi-functional. After the swamp stomp, the mud came right out! Tengchong. Another experience that I probably wouldn't have sought out on my own but it was well worth the stretch.

I've read 50 Shades of Grey and it is just okay.

After reading this article on NYmag about romance novels, specifically 50 Shades of Grey, I feel spurred to write a short ditty about this romance novel,  romance novels in general and my not-so-secret love for them. The fact that there is a more mainstream recognition of the popularity of romance novels and how it is a recession proof 1.5 billion dollar industry just makes my love of romance novels seem not so much as an anomaly. The fact that I was also awaken by my friend Koby, who is currently in med school in Grenada asking me if I've read the book made me realize the penetration of popular romance novels and how everyone assumes that I've read them. Well good news guys, I have!

As you may know, I live in rural China and am very far separated in distance from the taste makers and trends of American popular culture. I stay abreast in pop culture by trying to read books that are trending online as well as religiously downloading top 40 music. But that's neither here nor there. What I found the most surprisingly about 50 Shades of Grey was how simply it's written, and how it's a BDSM novel. What does BDSM stand for? Bondage and discipline/Dominance and submission/ as well as sadism and masochism. I just looked on Wikipedia, so you know it's true. Yeah, Google, search me now!

The main characters are a college senior named, Anastasia Steele and a 27 year old ultra successful business man named Christian Grey. Christian Grey embodies all that is smoldering and sexy. Anastasia doesn't know her own appeal and is inexperienced in almost every way. The book is an exploration into the very limited world of BDSM that Christian Grey seems to need. Three things stood out to me in the books. The first, is the use of the term itchy palms. If you've read the books, back me up on this, the itchy palms term made me laugh in the way that it was so seriously used. Second, the over-usage of email signatures in their text message and BBM conversations. Who uses email signatures with friends? Who modifies their email signatures with friends? and the third, and this is just a personal note, is that Anastasia's mom lives in Georgia. I love Georgia references in fiction and this is yet another one of them.

The book is the first in a trilogy, 50 Shades Darker, and 50 Shades Freed are the sequels. The stories are un-realistic and fantastic. Also, if you can believe it, apparently 50 Shades of Grey and its sequels are loosely based fan fiction from the Twilight series. Since I've never read the Twilight series, but I have been forced to watch the first movie thanks to my friend Meghan, I'll just assume that the idea is cringe worthy that Anastasia is Bella and Christian is Edward. At least this book has no vampires. Good bye undead trend, hello BDSM. BDSM for everyone!

The characters don't have very much emotional depth but there are a lot of sex scenes. 24, according to NYmag. I like romance novels that are more story and less sexy time! But.... feel free to go to Amazon.com and read the reviews of 50 shades if you are curious. It wasn't the best read but it was quick and fun one. Happy reading. If you want to read a beautiful romance novel, you should probably read into this one.

Photo highlights from Cherry Blossom Gorge

 樱҉花҉谷҉：

No cherry blossoms. Great waterfall.